...The term "gizmo huckster" comes compliments of "Cocobolo Cowboy," a participant on pool forums who is not otherwise known to me. Credit where credit is due.
A Gizmo Huckster is somebody who sells a product that really isn't better than the average or the standard, by imbuing it with some sort of specialness, or magical thinking, and heaping upon it fancy verbiage, or all three of those, coupled with stylish appearances and—most importantly—brazenly high price. The purpose of that effort is to create FUD in the mind of poor Mr. or Ms. Consumer.... Oops! Should I be using something better? Is my product good enough? Am I being held back by my suddenly "inferior" gizmo with which I was previously well satisfied in every way?
"Veblen goods" are goods that sell better when they're higher priced rather than lower—the opposite of high value. Once you're in the land of Veblen goods, status and prestige become very powerful agents of FUD ("fear, uncertainty, and doubt"). FUD is what plants the seed of anxiety in your mind that your good is not good enough, or says something about you that is better left unsaid. Consider, for example, recent news articles that tell us how the world's billionaires have recently been shamed for only having 100- and 150- foot yachts, such that they are all exchanging these sore-thumb signifiers of poverty for 200- and 300-foot yachts of the type that any self-respecting rich fellow really ought to have*. (Take a look at the yacht Steven Spielberg sold so he could buy a bigger one. Because you really need something more commodious than that meager thing.) The way those poor misguided fronting pretenders go around acting like 100-foot yachts are sufficient is just too much! And they think they are something! We laugh at them, and blow snot in their general direction**.
This post is not about pool, because I never write about pool, as regular readers know. But in pool—this is just an example—there is a thing called a cue tip. It's the little disc of shaped leather that gets glued to the business end of a cue. You then apply chalk this tip so it will grab some traction on the ball, because where you strike the cue ball with the tip (high, low, left, right) is how you impart spin and thereby control the subsequent action of the cue ball. For eons, the most you could spend on a cue tip was a few bucks. Then a company called Kamui came along and started selling cue tips for many multiples of what cue tips had always cost. This created mighty FUD! Since Kamuis cost $25 rather than $3, didn't they have to be better!? Doubtless somebody made much money. But then, there was so much extra money that Kamui began helping to sponsor tournaments, so where's the harm really. (I am wending my way to my point; strive to stay patient.) Not to be outdone, makers of chalk (chalk!) took the hint and strove to create FUD about the cheap chalk that had been working perfectly for generations for misguided souls who didn't know any better, such as Ronnie O'Sullivan and Efren Reyes, the greatest masters of snooker and pool respectively. This situation, too, was ripe for Gizmo Huckstering! And so sure enough. You can now spend $29 (twenty-nine dollars) on one piece of billiards chalk, and I wish I were kidding. At least it is aptly named after its creators.
I have not come to my point with any dispatch here because you already know what it is. Photography has been beset by Gizmo Huckstering probably right from 1839 until at least now. How many attempts have been made to finally, once and for all, create the perfect camera?*** I counted how many, and the number is 28,137****. And it still hasn't been done, because, obviously, I could spec a better camera than has ever been made. Off the top of my head.
Special steel and cellulose-based film-hanging Acme Grip Clip, made of material chosen to securely grip wet 35mm film. Pack of twelve (enough for three large developing tanks of film!) less than $2 each!!! Only $23.99
It was in darkroom products that Gizmo Huckstering reached its apex. Every man-Jack***** who ever worked in a darkroom bloomed with ideas for gizmos; you didn't have enough else to think about as you performed the drudgery. I didn't pay enough attention at the time, and so, sadly, cannot give you chapter and verse now, but there were whole catalogs, some on newsprint, even, chock-full of gizmos, gadgets, widgets and contraptions meant to improve every aspect of the photographic enterprise no matter how negligible or trifling. And of course, another aspect of gadgets and widgets intended for photography is that they were always priced higher because they were specially for photography! And how could anyone get by with something humdrum and lesser, when something specially designated as special could be had for only a few dollars more? Perfectly ordinary things were transformed into things of more value when they were designated as being for photography, even if they were the same dang thing people used for something else.
Protect yourself
My favorite example of this was when I once saw advertised some special filmstrip-hanging clips, used for hanging 5-foot strips of developed 35mm film to dry, which appeared from the illustration to be identical in every way to something called wooden clothespins. Which in that simple time were available very cheaply at any grocery store.****** And might still be. I must admit, though, that a wooden clothespin is absolutely the ideal thing to use to hang films to dry. You can even thread the line through the center of the little spring. It's perfect, really.
Here's the way to proof yourself against the practice of Gizmo Huckstering: learn to recognize feelings of FUD in yourself. When you feel it, you might be being conned. Especially, when something common and adequate is being promoted as needing replacement by something much more expensive, allow your anti-BS antennae to begin humming. More globally, you might consider whether you have an overarching preference for Veblen goods or high value. I know where I stand, but your mileage may vary*******, as they say. Heck, if I were a billionaire, I would probably be just the type to continue to be satisfied with a mere 100-foot yacht, even in the face of the withering scorn and blistering condescension of my peers. I hope I'm not boasting. It's just the kind of guy I am.
Mike
*This sentence unmasks me as a dolorous peasant, because those in the know know that the lengths of yachts are properly given in meters. (I may be dolorous but at least I am not malodorous.)
**Very old movie reference, proving I am old.
***That's what the engineers and marketers—no, sorry, make that marketers and engineers, because marketing comes first—at Pentax are attempting to do right now with their upcoming new 35mm film camera, which I am, in equal parts, a.) eagerly awaiting and b.) certain they will get wrong.
****I'm lying, I didn't count. But it must be some number that is very high.
*****Meaning "everyone without exception." A delightful antiquarian phrase derived from the now-extinct custom of addressing someone whose name one didn't know as "Jack," a common nickname for John. Earliest citation 1809, used by Dickens in Barnaby Rudge in 1841.
******The Mennonites around here still hang their clothes out to dry on clotheslines, in warm weather, and loaded lines are sometimes very picturesque, in a bucolic, nostalgic, country-Americana sort of way. I have never had the temerity to photograph them. That would be intrusive, to photograph someone's garments, including what used to be called unmentionables, wouldn't it? Creepy, even. And I place a high priority on not being creepy. Even asking for consent would be weird as heck, I think. So it's one of those things that can't be photographed, then. At least not by the scrupulous and the virtuous.
*******English for this overused phrase might be "your experience might be different." I think I'm going to stop using "your mileage may vary." I'm getting tired of it.********
********This post has more footnotes than any other post ever posted on TOP. Added value for you! At no extra cost.
Original contents copyright 2023 by Michael C. Johnston and/or the bylined author. All Rights Reserved. Links in this post may be to our affiliates; sales through affiliate links may benefit this site. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. (To see all the comments, click on the "Comments" link below or on the title of this post.)
Featured Comments from:
Chuck Albertson: "Nice clothespin. But is it archival?"
Mike replies: Yes!! Because you cut off the end of the filmstrip where it was touching. No contamination on the strips of negatives. :-)
Harry B Houchins: "Beginning my photo journey in the NYC fashion industry in 1966, I can relate to everything you say here. My experience is that everything has a creeping increase. You gotta have it! It's so cool, necessary, new! At 79 I haven't bought any new gear for five years. What have I missed?"
Mike replies: I think it's actually more satisfying to wait a longer time before updating. That way the changes are more pronounced. Like waiting till your car is really dirty before washing it.
Dave Levingston: "Made me think back a decade or so to my days as a motorcyclist. Everything for a motorcycle costs more because it's for a motorcycle. I used hiking rain suits because they cost about a quarter of motorcycle rain suits. And simple rubber rainboots worked just fine. I would tell my wife, 'Sure motorcycle tires cost much more than car tires, but on the other hand, they don't last nearly as long.'"
Nigel Voak: "Reading though this, I thought the piece would arrive at a point where the forthcoming Sony Alpha 9 Mark III would be named. At least my thoughts turned to this upcoming marvel whilst reading this post. Who on Earth needs a shutter speed of 1/80,000th of a second or 120 frames per second? How did I ever successfully do dance photography and even some sports stuff with a Nikon F801, with manual focus lenses? I am making digital copies right now of my old archive, and the shots were in focus, and I caught peak moment."
Mike replies: Even at my Fuji X-T1's highest speed of 8.31 frames per second, I found I still could get a moment before or after what I wanted! I learned to try my best to capture the exact moment even when in Continuous High mode. I had a higher success rate that way, plus some extra frames.
JH: "Brings back memories of the Porter's Camera Catalog. They had a thick newsprint catalog full of photo gadgets. I think I was buying stuff from them throughout the '70s and '80s—maybe '90s—when I still did my own darkroom work. Alas, they closed in 2019."
Roger Bartlett: "Over the weekend I watched a YouTube video by Adam Savage about Apple USB C cords and why they cost $130 as opposed to the same cord from Amazon costing $12. I expected to hear a similar conclusion to yours but was pleasantly surprised to hear that the $130 might actually be justifiable. It is worth watching this just to see some amazing technologies at work."
Jeff replies to Roger: "But it’s not 'the same cord.' The Apple version is Thunderbolt; the Amazon one, standard USB-C. Not exactly Apples to apples."
John C: "Re 'marketers and engineers': Sorry to pick nits Mike, but you spelled that wrong. It's 'marketeers'—you know, like 'mouseketeers.' However, I will vouch for your ordering, having been a software engineer myself."
Dave: "There isn't much that unites the whole of Europe when it comes to behaviour which doesn't then also line up with the behaviours of those in North America. But one thing I've noticed over the years is that a willingness/fear to hang washing outside seems to be one of those things. From what I know of the US (a lot of my family live there), hanging laundry to dry outside is regularly frowned upon and even, in some areas with particularly militaristic residents' associations, actually banned. Some radical types (like my sister) apparently insist on doing it and taking a stand, but they'll get regularly berated for it.
"I live in one of the soggiest, least sunny countries in the world (Scotland) and it's still completely normal to do so, here. If you want to come photograph it, feel free! Strolling through Edinburgh you'll see loads, and some of it even stretches across publicly accessible courtyards and greens."
Genuinely amusing! Thank you. Also instructive and informative. I think I kind of knew this, but it had never risen to the level of full consciousness. Thank you again!
Now... what happened to the iPhone 15 review (submitted by a reader) you were going to post?
Posted by: Jim Henry | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 11:33 AM
In Europe many, maybe most people hang their clothes on clotheslines with pegs. Given the amount of sushine there is in the US, I'm kind of surprised that the practice is so rare there. Your clothes dry more quickly in summer and smell better too. As for photographing them, they are a feature of most Mediterranean cities, usually on balconies or even stretched between buildings. For example these in Genoa
Posted by: Chris Bertram | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 11:33 AM
My granddaughter wanted me to purchase a 40oz Stanley tumbler for her. TikTok "influencers" have apparently captured her imagination. She couldn't understand my reticence at purchasing a $45 insulated tumbler for her. I informed her that if she couldn't finish her drink in eight hours before it got warm, she poured too much into her glass.
Posted by: Bob Docherty | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 12:13 PM
This post cannot be considered complete without mentioning speaker cables and power cords for HiFi equipment. Not to mention little stands for those cords to ensure they do not touch the floor. Some of the above sold for thousands of dollars. It's hard to know if anyone on earth could actually hear a difference over a lamp cord worth 75 cents - apparently not in blinded hearing tests. Yet, People bought them.
Posted by: Edward Taylor | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 12:16 PM
Ahem... not sure if you followed the recent International Championship (snooker) from Tianjin. Ronnie O'Sullivan struggled quite a bit in his semi-final, maybe having several kicks according to commentators (no-one really has nailed kicks but generally thought to relate to chalk) - so the new chalk is maybe not so much hype as you make out? He is still one of the few who still uses the 'old' chalk
Posted by: Richard Tugwell | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 12:58 PM
I wave my private parts at your aunties!
Posted by: Steve B. | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 01:16 PM
I think you are right: yachts should be measured in feet. Only people who wish to show off measure lengths of yachts in metres. The British who have some considerable history with the sea and do not need to show off measure their vessels, yachts, ships, all of them, in feet, although draught might be in fathoms (interesting useless fact: admiralty defined 'fathom' as 1/1000nm which is 6.08ft but in practice used 'warship fathom' which was 6ft).
Posted by: Zyni Moë | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 02:03 PM
Over the weekend I watched a You Tube video by Adam Savage about Apple USB C cords and why they cost $130 as opposed to the same cord from Amazon costing $12. I expected to hear a similar conclusion to yours but was pleasnatly surprised to hear that the $130 might actually be justifiable - It is worth watching this just to see some amazing technologies at work.
Posted by: Roger Bartlett | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 03:43 PM
"Gizmo Hucksters"?
Do you mean new car sales types?
Posted by: Daniel | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 03:57 PM
Wow! Do you think one of those fancy Que Tips would fit on my shutter release button? I'm sure that is just the accessory I need to take better pictures.
Posted by: Ken Lunders | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 04:05 PM
The lives that could be changed. The people who could be helped out of the morass of their circumstance and/or misfortune. You could home a thousand homeless souls for the cost of a single billionaires yacht.
Any of those things would bring lasting happiness. But the uberyacht is just a grotesque artifact. A joyless plea to be noticed and admired.
On the plus side, if the world ever revolts, it'll be easier to figure out who should be on the menu when the starving decide to eat the rich.
I jest! [MUST NOT MENTION SECRET PLAN TO EAT THE RICH]. All this writing is making me hungry.
Posted by: Kye Wood | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 06:03 PM
I worried about corosion on the ordinary steel spring, but the big difference was that hanging negs curl more when held only in the center than they do when held all along the top (and bottom).
Not that the cheap wider plastic clips I used cost very much! I certainly started out using clothespins, and they weren't at all bad.
Posted by: David Dyer-Bennet | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 06:44 PM
As I read through this post, one thing jumped to the top of my mind. Unlike Nigel, it was not the Sony A9III that popped into my mind - I will be on the waiting list for that and at the same price as its predecessor, the continued improvements will be a welcome replacement of my A9II. But no, what came to mind for me wasn't photographic, it was the insanity of a typical private college charging $90,000 per year. For a commercial photographer, that's a LOT of pictures!! With one already in college and another entering next year this is a daunting reality!
Posted by: JOHN B GILLOOLY | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 07:58 PM
Like Dave with motorcycles, I’ve observed the price bump in hardware (nuts, bolts, etc.). It seems the same products increase in price as they move from: general hardware, bicycle parts, marine hardware, aviation hardware - and we’ve all seen the stories about defense department hammers.
Posted by: Joe Iannazzone | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 08:05 PM
FUD is a well known brand of cheap cold cuts here in Mexico. It stands for fine, unique and delicious. In Old Scots it's quite rude.
Posted by: jeremy t | Sunday, 12 November 2023 at 08:38 PM
I've found that anything labelled as "for cyclists" costs a lot more than equivalent 'normal' items. When I ride my bicycle I wear 'hi-vis' items intended for builders, tradespeople etc. - not cyclists. They're about a quarter of the cost and conform to international and national visibility standards (which most gear labeled 'cycling' doesn't).
I will confess, though, to having 'gizmo' clips for drying film. I once bought some while shopping for darkroom supplies - because they have a hook on top which was just the right diameter to fit a clothes-rack I have, hooked behind my bathroom door (a good spot for drying). They didn't cost much more than clothes-pegs, though.
As for yachts? My only knowledge is through a friend who races his Sydney 38 twice per week. He'd dismiss all those you mentioned as "stink-boats" and would have nothing further (or nothing nice) to say about them.
...Mike
Posted by: MikeF | Monday, 13 November 2023 at 01:14 AM
I like the word “shyster”.
Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelt of elderberries.
Posted by: Not THAT Ross Cameron | Monday, 13 November 2023 at 05:05 AM
I will always remember one professor in my university explaining about pricing, and he wasn’t even a professor of marketing. You can take any device, say a multimeter that costs $100. Paint it grey and call it industrial and put a $200 price on it. Paint if white and call it medical, and sell it to a hospital with $400 price tag on it. Paint it olive green and sell it to the military for $800. Or paint it white again and call it Astro and sell it to NASA or similar for $1600.
Posted by: Ilkka | Monday, 13 November 2023 at 06:04 AM
The Acme Grip Clip makers are missing a FUD trick here; their product is not only low carbon but fully recyclable! : )
Posted by: Roger Bradbury | Monday, 13 November 2023 at 06:31 AM
OK. I'll say it: Fred Picker, Huckster-extraordinaire.
He was an American achtype: half shaman, three-quarters snake oil salesman in the LF photo realm. The thing was, some of his darkroom products were pretty dang good. I am thinking of his darkroom timer combined with a thermometer. It changed how it measured a "second" based on the temperature of the solution. And the thing really worked. For those of us with basement darkrooms, or who developed film year round (hot in summer, cold in winter) temperature drift in our developer solutions was something we all had to deal with one way or another. Fred's thermometer took one variable out of the equation in a manner I found really useful.
On the other hand: The copy hawking his print washer claimed that "fixer was heavier than water and that it sank to the bottom." MA-lark-Y! That's just not how physics or chemistry work. Still, I owned one and the prints I washed in it are indeed stain and fade-free 25 years later, so they did wash prints well, regardless of the Bull-Dinky claims he made for why they worked.
A lot of my coin made its way into Fred's pockets over the years. And because I enjoyed the products I bought from Fred, I viewed his marketing claims with a certain amount of tolerance. But that's part of the charm of Hucksterianus Americanus as a genus and species.
And as they say . . . born every minute/it takes two to tango/never give a sucker an even break. All as American as apple pie.
Posted by: Benjamin Marks | Monday, 13 November 2023 at 12:19 PM
Wow. And all I ever wanted out of life was a Hasselblad Lunar and a Kirby vacuum cleaner.
Posted by: Michael Matthews | Monday, 13 November 2023 at 12:23 PM
Back in the day, before Radio Schmuck went bankrupt, they used to sell this spray-can stuff called "TV Tuner Cleaner." It was some kind of solvent meant for cleaning mechanical/electrical contacts like the big clunky knobs on TV sets and it actually did a good job. It also undoubtedly enlarged the hole in the ozone layer, increased global warming, and induced asthma in puppies.
Four bucks for a can, although you could also pony up an extra buck for something called "COLOR TV Tuner Cleaner."
The best part was that the chemical name was written right there in the fine print on the can. So if you can't guess the difference between the two, simply note that "name" is not plural.
[
That's very funny, and a perfect example. --Mike]
Posted by: Steve Renwick | Monday, 13 November 2023 at 01:34 PM
The Little Mermaid got there first:
I've got gadgets and gizmos a-plenty
I've got whozits and whatzits galore
You want thingamabobs?
I've got twenty!
But who cares?
No big deal
I want more
Of course, Ariel did not know what any of them did. Which is probably not all that different from the folks who should know better.
And I know that you are doing it for humor, Sarah Ruden's The Gospels has a lot of footnotes on each page so they go something like this: *, dagger, Paragraph sign, **, double dagger.
Posted by: KeithB | Monday, 13 November 2023 at 02:56 PM
Your "Cocobolo Cowboy" doesn't deserve that credit. "Gizmo" was a common slang term tracing to the early days of WWII. It simply meant gadget or contrivance. "Huckster" was in popular use during the same era. The term was generally applied to salesmen, but most especially to the persistent pitchmen who created and delivered radio and TV commercials, as made famous in the 1945 novel The Hucksters, by Frederic Wakeman Sr., and by the ensuing blockbuster movie of the same name, featuring Clark Cable and Ava Gardner.
Bryan Geyer
Posted by: Bryan Geyer | Monday, 13 November 2023 at 07:34 PM
P.S.: I'm wrong in citing Ava Gardner as Clark Gable's co-star in that movie. Gardner was in the film, but the female lead was filled by Deborah Kerr, a truly gifted performer who played stage roles as well as movies.
Posted by: Bryan Geyer | Monday, 13 November 2023 at 07:49 PM
Ah, the spring clothes peg! A brilliant design.
Which, if I believed in God, would convince me the Shakers who supposedly first made them, really did have a direct line to the Almighty.
The late John Loengard produced a fine black-and-white study of the Shaker Village at Sabbath Day Village, Maine. While Sam Abell did his version in colour.
To the best of my recollection, both missed the spring clothes peg.
Posted by: John | Tuesday, 14 November 2023 at 09:31 AM
After years of using dollar-store clothespins, I actually got picky about buying better ones and it was a great decision. I use them professionally, primarily to attach gels to barn doors of lights for filmmaking, but also for many other things during a shoot, so anything that saves me time and works more reliably is worth it.
The premium clothespins I now use have two improvements: the springs have a much greater radius where they extend out into hooks, so on both sides of the clothespin, it is over top of both of the wooden part - this does a much better job of preventing the wooden parts from skewing side-to-side and the entire clothespin falling apart. The second is that there are grooves cut into the wood where you pinch them, to provide extra grip, which is not often useful on its own, but quite useful if you disassemble it and reassemble it with the wooden parts flipped, so the previous hand grips now face inside and are the gripping surface of a more narrow end, looking more like tweezers, and better able to fit into tight spaces.
The second benefit is marginal, but the first cannot be overestimated when compared to standing on top of a ladder trying to attach something to a light, as dozens of people are waiting for you to finish your work, and an inferior clothespin simply falls apart in your hands!
[Have you got a link so we can see what you're talking about? —Mike]
Posted by: Stephen S. | Tuesday, 14 November 2023 at 11:26 AM
Do you Hi Fi enthusiasts remember Sonic Stones?
For a sum of way more than they were worth you could get 5 or 6 black flat stones to place on top of your speaker. Numerous Stereo magazines published reviews swearing that the sound quality improved.
If it didn't you could skim them across a lake...
Posted by: John Sullivan | Tuesday, 14 November 2023 at 12:51 PM
Unfortunately the exact clothespins I obsess over are no longer available from the place I got them from, but the Whitmor 6026-868 clothespins looks really darn close!
Posted by: Stephen S. | Wednesday, 15 November 2023 at 12:25 PM