[Note: This post was significantly edited on Wednesday evening. I shouldn't have written, as I did, about the program I've used for my recovery from alcoholism, because I am unable to be anonymous in the context of TOP. If you'd like to read the original post, please email me personally with your request and and I will give you a private link. My email address is mcjohnston@mac.com.
I will leave the comments up that have already come in. —Mike]
I passed a significant milestone in my sobriety a few weeks ago. Just another day, but I was happy—happy beforehand, happy during the event, happy afterward. I didn't question it—I just felt good. One day at a time, yeah—but the days, they do get behind you.
Today will be one more.
Passing gratitude along
This won't be for everybody, but for those who have a desire to stop drinking or know someone who does, I just wanted to pass along one important thing that you might not know:
It's dangerous to quit drinking on your own—"cold turkey" as it's called. Although alcohol addiction is common and many people who drink heavily for short periods don't become addicted, alcoholism is still a fearsome addiction and among the worst from a health and wellness point of view. Enduring a chronic bombardment of alcohol exacts a heavy toll on your body, which is forced to adapt; when the alcohol is abruptly cut off, your brain chemistry and nervous system can go a little crazy. Accurate figures are elusive, but about 4–10% of people who stop drinking abruptly will experience the dreaded delirium tremens (DTs), seizures, or hallucinations, and between 1% and 3% die from withdrawal. I have heard many times from fellow recovering alcoholics about a friend, relative or acquaintance who died after going cold turkey. Just heard about another one the other night. And the symptoms can appear suddenly, even many hours after your last drink.
Alcohol is among the worst drugs to detox from. What you might want to consider as a first step toward recovery is to do what I did, which is to sign yourself in to a licensed detox center. "Detox," for detoxification, is the name for the medical quarantine that gets you through the physical danger of withdrawal. "Rehab" is a longer period of hospitalization to help you begin to modify your habits and thinking and adjust to the shock of sudden sobriety. Detox isn't treatment; rehab is. Detox just gets you past the physical danger and medicates you to lessen your discomfort during withdrawal, which otherwise can be anything from uncomfortable to almost unendurable. Of course you can stop drinking on your own or in a 12-step program, but you should know that it's dangerous and that being medically supervised is safer, smarter, and less painful.
Detox also gives you a "leg up" on sobriety and gives you a nice starting date for your sobriety. I use as my sobriety date September 10th, 1990, the first complete day I stayed sober after leaving detox the day before.
For this post, I spoke to the Chief of Operations at the recovery unit at a local hospital here and learned a few things about detox programs. First of all, they're of shorter duration than they used to be. It used to last 7–10 days, but the insurance companies are putting pressure on providers, and now it's typically five days. Same with rehab—it used to be as long as 60 days and now is as short as 21. Rules vary from State to State, but in my State, New York, it's illegal for a hospital to deny services to someone who wants detoxification. Insurance almost always pays for it; if they won't, or if you don't have insurance, the hospital I spoke to will charge a sliding scale that ranges from $32 to $400 a day—but the guy I spoke to said, "No one pays $400," and, if you can't afford even $32, the hospital will treat you for free. He said they just have to keep a balance, because they can't afford to fill all the beds with non-paying patients.
Many hospitals will even send a van or a driver to pick you up.
Another change from 1990 is that detox is now being provided in many places on an outpatient basis. You go for an hour a day for medications and to be monitored, instead of checking in for the duration. This isn't as easy—it's harder to resist resuming drinking when you're "on the outside"—but the upside is that it gets people in the program. People who would be deterred from enrolling at all in an inpatient program now have another option.
So if you have a desire to quit drinking, my advice is to start with detox, and continue with the recommendations they will provide you with.
I'm very happy to have been sober for 27 years now!
—Mike
"Open Mike" is the often off-topic, anything-goes editorial page of TOP. It's supposed to appear on Wednesdays, and sometimes even does.
Original contents copyright 2017 by Michael C. Johnston and/or the bylined author. All Rights Reserved. Links in this post may be to our affiliates; sales through affiliate links may benefit this site.
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Featured Comments from:
Rodger Kingston: "Congratulations, Mike. While I am not an alcoholic, I am a compulsive overeater, so I understand what a big deal your 27 years of sobriety is. For many years I attended OA meetings, with mixed success, partly due to the religious component, but mostly due to my lack of honesty and integrity. I've tried many diet plans for over 30 years, and can say that for me at least, diets just don't work.
"A year ago August 1, I suffered a stroke (thankfully with no residual effects), and was in the hospital for almost two weeks for two surgeries relating to a 90% blocked left carotid artery that they fortunately discovered.
"That was a mighty wake-up call. I decided on an 'Attitude of Gratitude' (AA/OA), and became a partner rather than a patient in my recovery. And rather than go on another fruitless diet, I determined to simply (!?!) change how and what I eat; now, nearly 14 months later, I've lost and kept off nearly 60 pounds without the struggle and self-destructive behavior that always accompanied my previous attempts. While I haven't got anything like your 27 years, I believe that I will stick to this new way of being. It feels comfortable and right.
"We OA'ers can't swear off eating as recovering alcoholics can swear off drinking: after all, we have to eat our 'drug of choice' to stay alive and healthy. What I've done is to limit the size of my three healthy meals, cut out all snacks between meals, and cut out dessert—particularly sugar—completely. (It sounds a lot like OA, but without the meetings.)
"According to the largest and smallest holes on my belt, I've lost nine inches from my waist (above). My type II diabetes is well controlled; my blood pressure and cholesterol are normal; many of my meds have been reduced or eliminated; it's no longer painful to walk; and I'm wearing smaller clothes retrieved from the Time Machine in my basement. My wife is thrilled. I feel very blessed."
Mike replies: Good for you Rodger! Outstanding.
I don't know this for sure, but the "Insurance usually pays for it" might be because of the generous mental health benefits under the ACA. If that changes, all bets might be off, though New York might be safer than most.
I am mainly commenting here to get people to contact their senators to cut off Cassiday/Graham at the knees.
Posted by: KeithB | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 03:38 PM
It's a good thing I haven't needed AA, because their approach is philosophically incompatible with me. Some secular people manage to fake it (and of course some AA groups are much more blatantly religious than others) and get what they need, but I doubt I could (I'm no good at, and strongly philosophically opposed to, sweeping major issues under the rug; as this comment could be seen as demonstrating).
There have been more and more science-based rationalist recovery approaches starting up, which is a good thing. And there's starting to be some actual scientific research on recovery.
I kind of associate AA and their "never drink" approach with the War on Drugs, and I consider them all part of the same problem (they all, after all, are claiming to "help" people).
I'm certainly glad you found something to help you when you needed help, anyway; so good for AA, and good for you! Congratulations on 27 years.
Posted by: David Dyer-Bennet | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 03:49 PM
Michael: Congrats on 27 years. Very glad to see you comment on this. I ended up being the CEO of a nationally accredited treatment program as a part of my other nonprofit management duties involving homeless people-though they actually came from all walks of life, politicians, famous football players -one of whom graduated from the University of Nebraska without knowing how to read or write, etc.. So many of my staff became friends and most were in AA. If there is a more caring, accepting group of people around I wouldn't know who they are. Recovery and all or nearly all of the social opportunities most people need-and for some the first time in there lives. There are many facets to recovery as you know better than I, but AA is a remarkable organization (or non-organization) that is great for many-though sadly not a good fit for some. Congrats again!
Posted by: Del Bomberger | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 03:58 PM
Lovely post - thank you.
Posted by: Patrick Dodds | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 04:03 PM
Mike, I read your blog every day. My admiration for you is considerable. And yet, while I applaud your description of the healing power and joy of AA I wish to remind you of our 11th tradition: "Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio and films."
While a photography blog is not, strictly speaking, press, radio or a film, the same principal applies in some degree. But to what degree? Fortunately, for us, this is a decision which we leave up to the individual. I neither criticize nor applaud but thought you should be aware.
With affectionate wishes,
Rob
[You're right, Rob, so I took down the original post which was called "Happy Day" and replaced it with one called "About Detox" that doesn't mention AA. --Mike]
Posted by: Rob | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 04:19 PM
By the way, hearty congratulations to you on 27 years!
Posted by: Rob | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 04:21 PM
Congrats, Mike.
I want to add that detox from some medicines, like opioids and benzo, can be extremely difficult also. Some as dangerous to go cold turkey on, and some take *many months* to safely detox from! Even with substitution medicine. Many doctors don't even know, clearly, that many of these meds create *very* strong physical dependencies beyond a few weeks. A doctor told me that for some meds (like Lorazepam/Ativan), he had not heard of anybody who had successfully detoxed without pro help!
Posted by: Eolake | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 04:23 PM
Thank you, and a "good job" for you. Teared me up a bit.
Meanwhile in Finland, the lawmakers are going through the motions to make alcohol easier to buy and abuse. With a considerably less well-off AA-system than the US of A. Makes me sad, seeing the perpetual damage that alcohol does.
But, I'm extremely happy for you and your fellows at "the rooms".
Posted by: Mikko Kalavainen | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 04:27 PM
Congrats! And well deserved...
Posted by: Stan B. | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 04:30 PM
Hi Mike
Thanks for sharing this. It is truly life-saving information. AA is a way of life as well as being a program of recovery. As a Christian, I find it deeply spiritual and transforming.
"The joy is in the journey. Trust God."
Posted by: frsteve | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 05:11 PM
Beautiful. Thank you, Mike. Transforming deep and intensive work into an extensive gift for the rest of us.
Posted by: Michael | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 05:43 PM
11/22/96
Posted by: jrittvo | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 06:07 PM
Respect.
Posted by: Anders Holt | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 06:14 PM
Thanks, Mike, and congratulations. Let me also put in a good word for Al Anon Family Groups, a cooperating organization to AA for people affected by alcoholism in family and friends. I won't try to describe the program, which is best learned from reading the literature. But I will quote the suggested program Welcome to note that " no situation is really hopeless and that it is possible for us to find contentment, and even happiness, whether the alcoholic is still drinking or not." Need it? Google it. 'nuff said.
Posted by: Bill Poole | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 06:21 PM
Good for you Mike. Life is full of road blocks and things that will draw one away from a good path for ones life. You found your way around a big one.
Stay healthy, I enjoy reading your stuff as much as I'm sure you enjoy writing it.
Best, p
Posted by: brad | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 06:21 PM
Thank you Mike, I appreciate the OT today. I have 8 months today, and my life is getting better every day.
Posted by: Michael | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 06:34 PM
Attitude of gratitude. Way to go Mike J. I can't but we can one day at a time
Posted by: Tom Currier | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 07:45 PM
As a photographer of many years and NOT an alcoholic (although alcoholics have had an effect on my life), this is the very best writing I have ever read on AA and how it helps alholics. Great job, Mike...and congratulations on reaching a major milestone. Keep it up!
Posted by: Jim | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 07:45 PM
Heartiest and sincerest congratulations Mike. Detox, Betty Ford, and continuing AA not only saved our wonderful son's life, but made him a far better man, husband and father, and he already was a great one. His marriage is much stronger, their children have the best parents, and he actively counsels others, returns to Betty Ford every anniversary (7). Everywhere we go together in his community, there's someone he sponsored coming over for a good hug or a chat.
Thank you for writing this.
Gabe
Posted by: Gabe | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 08:13 PM
I'm happy for you, Mike. Congratulations. Bill
Posted by: Bill Wheeler | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 08:18 PM
Thanks for sharing this Mike - like much of what you have shared over the years very personal - and also inspirational
Posted by: Andrew Korlaki | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 08:33 PM
Happy Anniversary!
Best thing that ever happened to me (other than the wife who puts up with me).
God Bless.
Posted by: Jerry C. | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 08:57 PM
Congratulations Mike. Recovering and staying recovered from any addiction takes guts. Especially one that messes with your physical and mental chemistry. I have the highest admiration for those that can tough it out.
Posted by: Eric Rose | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 09:22 PM
Congrats on another day, and every day, Mike.
Joel
Posted by: Joel Becker | Wednesday, 20 September 2017 at 11:16 PM
Congratulations Mike! I no nothing of the AA in the US but it seems the eleventh rule of the AA is not to talk about the AA.
Whatever the methodology, it takes great personal commitment, hard work and courage to overcome an addiction. Well done.
Posted by: David Cope | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 12:39 AM
Congratulations Mike. I follow your blog daily and admire your honesty and can sense the joy on your continuing triumph on your recovery.
Posted by: Danny P | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 04:09 AM
Mike, congratulations. Very nice post and one I am sure was not easy to write. Keep up your good work. All the best Eric
Posted by: Eric Erickson | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 04:48 AM
Hi Mike
I am myself an alcoholic, sober for a little more than eight years. I would very much like a link to the original post.
Kind regards
Søren from Denmark
Posted by: Søren Kristiansen | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 05:51 AM
It works if you work it!
Posted by: Jim Grey | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 06:09 AM
A good story, though AA would never work for me, due to its religious basis.
I drink more ethanol than I would like to (both cost and health considerations) but I drink less than I did when younger—I am 65. I have successfully cut down by about a quarter to a third (mostly wine with meals) in recent times, but am finding it tough to get any further.
I have begun drinking tea again after a long break, as something of a transference activity; that helps. I’m giving myself until Xmas to make some more progress.
What gets my goat is the illogical and misleading language used even by health care ‘professionals’ when they speak of “alcohol and drugs”. Alcohol IS a drug, and because of its widespread abuse, it has societal costs higher than, say, marijuana, excepting law enforcement costs and penalties.
Australia has a booze culture, but it has been changing of late, with drinking at a fifty year low; younger people are drinking less. The same tendency applies in the UK and US.
Posted by: Ian Goss | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 06:21 AM
Congratulations!
Posted by: Richard Parkin | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 08:33 AM
Congratulations to you Mike. Overcoming an addiction like that takes courage and fortitude. You have my respect. And good wishes for another 27 years.
Posted by: Peter Wright | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 09:18 AM
Hi Mike,
If you don't care to reply to this, that is fine. If you don't care to have it in the comments section that is also fine.
But, I don't understand this comment and the big overnight edit:
"Mike, I read your blog every day. My admiration for you is considerable. And yet, while I applaud your description of the healing power and joy of AA I wish to remind you of our 11th tradition: 'Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio and films.'
While a photography blog is not, strictly speaking, press, radio or a film, the same principal applies in some degree. But to what degree? Fortunately, for us, this is a decision which we leave up to the individual. I neither criticize nor applaud but thought you should be aware.
With affectionate wishes,
Rob
[You're right, Rob, so I took down the original post which was called "Happy Day" and replaced it with one called 'About Detox' that doesn't mention AA. --Mike]"
[Robert, AA recommends that AA members themselves refrain from representing or promoting the organization in public settings, "...ever reminding us to place principles before personalities." You can read about it here:
https://www.aa.org/assets/en_US/en_tradition11.pdf
I discussed my original post with several AAs last night at the meeting, and decided that I should do my best to comply with AA's traditions. I might not agree or entirely understand, but it's not up to me--my job is to follow the fellowship's rules in the best way I can as part of my own continuing recovery program. --Mike]
Posted by: Robert Newcomb | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 09:44 AM
Congratulations on 27, Mike.
My sister has been dry now for about 35 years, and is in all ways better off than she was before (and she'll tell you exactly that). It hasn't always been easy, and her experience is one of the factors because of which I don't drink, but life has been so much better for her.
Enjoy life, it's a grand ride.
Posted by: steveH | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 10:16 AM
Congratulations.
I'll quote something I was told every year: "thats a good start". That did tick me off the first few times I heard it.
Keep coming back.
7/28/81
Posted by: paul in Az | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 10:37 AM
Congratulations on 27 years. And may there be many more 27-year anniversaries.
Posted by: Bill Tyler | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 10:56 AM
I was rather afraid you would do what any conscientious member of AA would do in response to comments you may have received: take down the original post. Fortunately I was able to save a copy. Re-reading it I am sure with 27 years you too have been rocketed into the 4th dimension of which the book speaks. Therefore I am confident that you admire and love AA just as much as I do. Although I have a mere decade in, I have come to love and respect everyone in AA. As a result my life is rich and full - as I expect yours is. Discerning your love and admiration for the program which has saved us both, I knew you would appreciate and consider the words of the 11th tradition. That tradition calls upon us to sublimate our human instincts to the betterment of AA as a practice of humility. Your share is a very powerful one and I expect that your 12th step work is powerful and effective as a result. When I came in I wanted what you guys have: serenity, peace of mind and calmness of body and mind. I wish you the very best !
Posted by: Rob Elliott | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 11:34 AM
Congratulations Mike. I always wanted my father to follow a detox program. Since I was a kid I remember him drinking one bottle of red wine every day, half at lunch and half at dinner. He was a very strong and healthy guy, save for his every day bottle of wine. He died at 91 of a heart stroke. He was still working sporadically, doing structural calculations, being an accomplished civil engineer.
Posted by: Marcelo Guarini | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 01:18 PM
Dear Mike,
I really appreciated your original post about your success with AA. Congrats on that chip. I worked the 12 steps myself for a number of years and have high regard for them and the 12 traditions.
Just my 2 cents, but I don't think your post violated the 11th tradition. This is because the nature of blogging is so personal. It just isn't like traditional media. As a reader of yours I feel like I have a relationship with you and your regular contributors and commentors that borders on the personal. As such, I didn't feel you were representing or promoting AA, just offering a testimonial about your experience with the program. Like all your posts, I found that one thoughtful and helpful, something shared in our electronic living room as if over coffee, "Hey friends, today's a special day for me..."
To my understanding, the tradition of anonymity in 12-step is about protecting other's privacy and about avoiding controversy. Your meeting's consensus notwithstanding, I don't think you crossed these lines. Your piece clearly put principles before personalities and reached out to those who still suffer. Of course, it's been years since I've been to a meeting and I imagine the 12-step community has evolved healthy traditions to deal with social media, blogging, vlogging, etc. which could be the sticking point.
Last point: blogs are a bi-directional medium. They're conversational because of their comments sections. They have more in common with a church basement than with broadcasting, narrowcasting, publishing. The discussion engendered by a post (on a well moderated site like yours) illuminates that post, clarifies it, ensures it stays on track. You work hard to maintain this function of your publication. In this context, and in the context of the TOP community, your post in no way stirred the pot; it was an act of service.
I understand why you edtited your post. I also think it's a shame you had to. In no way do I mean to knock AA or your group. AA's conservative nature is a strength, but in this case I think they're retarding a really productive form of outreach. But who am I to judge? Their perennial resistance to self promotion and reliance on word of mouth has served them well for a long time.
Sincerely yours,
My name is Jeff.
[Many thanks for the thoughtful reply, Jeff. --Mike]
Posted by: Jeff Hohner | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 04:30 PM
Congratulations Mike. Our addictions are the strongest foe most of us encounter. It takes courage and discipline to win. Thanks for being a great example.
Posted by: kirk tuck | Thursday, 21 September 2017 at 09:29 PM
Congrats Mike. I cold turkeyed smoking after 18 years of a 2 pack/day habit in September of 1990. I know how tough it is to quit an addiction like that. One of the hardest things I've ever done, but SO glad I did.
Posted by: Blake A. | Friday, 22 September 2017 at 01:47 PM
Thanks for sharing. I remember a quote from a close buddy: "One drink is not enough, one drink is too much."
It's unfortunate insurance companies are chintzy. It's unfortunate that rehab centers often prioritize profit over patients.
The insurance/medical industrial complex skimp on mental health care too.
Like you said, treating addiction is a matter of mind and body. Kudos for being open, honest, and for explaining detox versus rehab. Thanks, Mike.
Posted by: Bob Rosinsky | Saturday, 23 September 2017 at 04:09 PM
I am profoundly happy for you. You have every right to be absolutely thrilled. I salute you on bended knee as I slowly tip my cap.
Posted by: Tom Kaszuba | Monday, 25 September 2017 at 01:39 AM