TOP will be off for a week starting May 10th while your humble editor attempts to stay away from the computer screen where he spends most of his life. I plan to force myself into encounters with what is known as reality, using only my God-given senses to perceive this "reality" directly. I am a bit trepidatious about this project, and suppose the coming week will not be the easiest, but we'll see. I was born into reality so I am not entirely a stranger to it.
That's not all. During this week I am also going to try to interact with others of my species face-to-face, using my vocal chords to form words instead of the normal, usual, comfortable thing, the keyboard. Forgive me if I do not answer my email.
Because blogs are notoriously difficult to search for past articles, here's a selection of old things written by moi or published previously on TOP which you might not have seen, which hopefully will tide you over:
"The Danger of Revisiting Your Work," by Roger Overall (2014)
"Preparing a Portfolio, Part II," by Mike (on MIR.com, 1999)
"Big Prints from 4/3-Format Sensors," by Carl Weese (2012)
"Sobel v. Eggleston: the Decision" (a dispute over limited editions), by Mike, (2013)
"The Liberated Camera, Part II" (about the advantages of face-detection autofocus), by John Kennerdell (2011)
"The Full-Frame Dilemma...and a Cure," by Mike (2008)
"Bill Jay's Vision," by Jim Hughes (2012)
"Pots of Gold" (originally titled "The Photographer's Lament"), by Mike, 2015
"Voja Mitrovic, Printer to the Greats," by Peter Turnley (2010)
"The Filter Flare Factor," by Mike (on Steve's Digicams, 2005)
"UPS [uninterruptible power supply] Is Your Friend," by Ctein (2013)
"Not now, Dear, I've Just Been Killed By a High-Powered Rifle" (a stain on the honor of Wisconsin), by Mike (2007)
...And that's just a very small selection. For more, you are cordially invited to visit The Archives.
Brooks Hatlen leaves home
In the coming week I am hoping I will not be too much like Brooks Hatlen, too accustomed to my normal confinement to find anything but bewilderment in the outside world*. I shall report back about how I fared when the normal order of things resumes here on Wednesday, May 17th.
With best regards,
TOP's chief shoeshiner, bottlewasher, and polisher of the verbiage,
Mike
*I'm just funnin', of course. No way my job is like prison. I have the third-best job in the entire world**.
**I've written about this before, but, in case you missed it, the second best job in the World is Billy Joel's. He lives in a big mansion on Long Island, and whenever Madison Square Garden in New York City has nothing going on, they call Billy. He gets into his helicopter, flies in, and puts on a rollicking three-hour show of all his old hits—which of course he could play in his sleep—in front of tens of thousands of raucous, adoring fans. He has a great time, and is back in his helicopter before the last of the cheering dies down. He then eats a late dinner in his own dining room and goes to sleep in his own bed. Take-home pay for the day: about a million bucks. This gig would be number one, except that [snarky comment about having to hear Billy Joel songs too many times deleted out of consideration for Billy Joel fans].
Number one best job, of course (who else could it be?) is Dan Castellaneta's. He's the voice of Homer Simpson (and Barney Gumble, Grampa Simpson, Mayor Quimby, Krusty the Klown, and Groundskeeper Willie) on "The Simpsons." First of all, he's the voice of Homer Simpson. How great would that be? You'd never shut me up. Second, he gets paid $400,000 per episode, which is 100% gravy...considering he sounds like Homer Simpson.
Honorable mention for Vanna White, who has the easiest job in the world. Hers is not exactly a good job, because it lacks any redeeming reward such as engagement, usefulness, or intellectual challenge. She is paid two million dollars a year to turn letters over on the game show "Wheel of Fortune" (she definitely won the real-life wheel of fortune). Incredibly, a number of years ago they made her job easier...now, instead of rotating the letters manually, which was already incredibly easy, she just touches the screen and the letter appears electronically. Never was labor-saving more gratuitous. It's doubtful anyone ever made more money at a regular job in return for less actual work.
Am I staying away from the computer yet? Sheesh....
Original contents copyright 2017 by Michael C. Johnston and/or the bylined author. All Rights Reserved. Links in this post may be to our affiliates; sales through affiliate links may benefit this site.
Writing to be read
Give Mike a “Like” or Do us a big favor and go shopping while we're powered down
(To see all the comments, click on the "Comments" link below.)
Featured Comments from:
No featured comments yet—please check back soon!
Good luck !
Remember Sun Glasses, sun Screen, ear plugs for sensory overload, and a compass, Reality is big.
Oh, and it has weather, so bring a jacket.....
If you can find one, take a sunset sail on your beautiful lake.
Enjoy Yourself
Posted by: Michael Perini | Tuesday, 09 May 2017 at 03:08 PM
For my own amusement, I once wrote on the blackboard that listed what jobs we were all doing, "Away for two weeks for a well earned rest".
When I came back from holiday, somebody (I have a fair idea who) had added, "Yes, for us!"
Fair enough! : )
Posted by: Roger Bradbury | Tuesday, 09 May 2017 at 06:17 PM
Have a good break/Hope you had a good break.*
* Delete as applicable. ;)
Posted by: Steve Higgins | Thursday, 11 May 2017 at 12:55 PM
Enjoy your week, finally you have time to watch all those TV-Shows you missed while you were sitting in front of your Computer screen ;P
Btw, love that BJ job description.
Posted by: Erik | Friday, 12 May 2017 at 06:47 AM
Not a peep out of you.
Good for YOU -- you're sticking to it!
Posted by: Bill Mitchell | Friday, 12 May 2017 at 11:48 AM
I had some kids tell me that I sound like Homer Simpson. I feel better knowing I sound like Dan Castellaneta.
Posted by: John Krumm | Sunday, 14 May 2017 at 06:56 PM